not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Randomize
