Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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