need another drink. this is the easiest way
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
This baby is an asshole
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Randomize
