I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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