Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
