Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
