did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
