Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
