i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Randomize
