I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Randomize