how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Randomize
