do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
