4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
