Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
