Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
