is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
