ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
