Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Randomize