she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
