Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
