I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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