So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Randomize