well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize