This girl is more easily done than said...
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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