Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
