Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize