You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
