Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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