And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
