I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Randomize
