so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
and she was petting her beer can
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Randomize
