Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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