There was a lot of him and a little penis
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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