is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
We named our party play list daddy issues
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
