Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
