They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Randomize
