I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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