I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize