he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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