Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
