i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
the day after is always just damage control
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
