I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I am mentally ready for anal.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize