i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
