New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
