Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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