Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize