I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
