Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
