Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
