Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Randomize